Types
It's human nature to gravitate towards the known and comfortable. Being a member of a sub-culture, this is even more apparent. It seems that everyone has a set list of attributes that they find attractive (e.g. their "type"). Like a paradigm though, it can occlude anything that is outside of their "type".
I thought I had a type as well when I attempted dating. As I went along, I found that my idea of the ideal "type" was too narrow (well unrealistic is more like it). I've gone out on dates with individuals that I would have never thought I'd go out with and have enjoyed their company....but it never goes farther than that...because I'm not their "type". I can't be angry with them. I think that being in a sub-culture that often is repressive because of exterior socio/religious/political forces on those individuals, when a person finally gets enough courage to develop relationships...they go for their "idealized" guy/gal that they have been denied in normal situations.
A friend once said, "Finding the perfect guy is like finding a parking spot, all the good ones are taken. All the remaining ones have issues." No one is a perfect. Even saints have their hang-ups. I know so many good guys and women that are kind, funny, smart, and cute...but they always complain that there is no one out there.
After all this ruminating...I'll admit that there have been times where I've gone on dates and thought, "Ok, this isn't going to work." So I'm not a saint and have my "type" as well.
posted by Oodles and Oodles of O's @ 10:12 PM
1 Comments:
Finding the right guy IS like happening on a great parking spot. What a uniquely urban experience. Can you imagine what it's like trying to find the right guy in a rural environment? There might only be two or three age-appropriate gents within a 200 mile radius! No wonder cities feature the highest concentration of gay folks (largely re-located from Ozark, Alabama or Billings, Montana, or Sitka, Idaho, or...); we're maximizing our opportunities. An attempt to collapse our radius of possibility from 200 miles to a few square miles.
But then we go MAD and begin parking in every open spot, regardless of 'fit', often for a night or a week, and often without consideration of the fact that the space might already be reserved.
This metaphor (or would it be an analogy?) should be put to rest soon; it's getting over-worked and will loose its charm.
For those who still seek the perfect parking spot, I think it's a waiting game. Think of it as putting your hazards on and lingering near the entrance to Safeway, sometimes watching hungrily the person making her way under burden of groceries slowly from exit to parking lot ("surely she's leaving soon, maybe I'll follow her with the car, but I won't be too obvious!")
Trouble with that, as Evelyn Couch (Fried Green Tomatos) discovered, is that you have to be quick on the accelerator pedal or some zippy bottle-blond will slide in first!
Post a Comment
<< Home